Celebrating and Remembering

Went for an ultrasound scan this morning to see if anything has changed since my last scan in November.

In November, my scan showed that my right ovary was enlarged, which could explain the constant pain I still had on my right hand side.  There were also signs of the lining of my uterus being thickened, which is a definite sign of Adenomyosis.

Dr V started me on a contraceptive pill after that scan in November to try and reduce the severe constant pelvic pain I was suffering from.

So the scan this morning showed...

+ My right ovary appears to have shrunk back to a more normal size!  The sonographer even went so far as to tell me I had a "gorgeous little ovary" which was slightly weird, but made me smile 😊

+ There aren't any signs of thickening in my uterus any more and the sonographer said it looked perfect!

I haven't read the report yet or asked Dr V what she thinks of the latest scan, but I'm really happy that things are looking a bit more like they should.

The only thing that scares me is a thought that occurred to me yesterday.  The fact that the little blue contraceptive pill that I'm taking is probably the only thing standing between me and the constant severe pain that I had every waking minute before I started taking it.

The question in my mind is 'Does this mean that I'm going to have to stay on Norimim for the long term just to be able to function?'  Something I'll have to ask Dr V on Friday I suppose.

Today isn't just about celebrating ultrasound results though...

Exactly 1 year ago today, I went under the knife for the first time in my life to have a Diagnostic Laparoscopy.

It was Thursday 16th January 2014.  I had been in hospital for 3 days this time - my second admission in 7 days.

I had been offered the following 3 options...

+ Do nothing and see a Gynaecologist in an Outpatient clinic at some point (no way was I taking that option and going home in constant pain to wait who knows how long)

+ Go on the contraceptive pill for 3 months and then consider surgery (again I couldn't bear the thought of waiting any longer to try something else, I just wanted to know)

or

+ Go on the acute list and have diagnostic surgery while an inpatient

After a few tears and a serious discussion with my Mum, I chose to have surgery while in hospital.  The doctors tried their best to discourage me from having surgery by quoting 'there's only a 50% chance we'll find something' and 'we probably won't find anything', but I wasn't going to be discouraged.  I'd had enough of struggling and being in pain and just wanted to know either way what was going on.

After being on standby for a spot in theatre since Wednesday morning, I went in for surgery on Thursday morning. 

Yes, I cried beforehand and I'm not ashamed to admit it.  It's a really hard decision to make to have surgery when everyone is trying to put you off, but I stayed strong and stuck with my decision.
Turns out, my anaesthetist was a friend of someone I know whose daughters I babysit for, so Ev helped me out with a few jokes and a good chat before I went under.  I think God must have sent Ev to be my guardian angel and he really made things easier.

And then I was out of it 😴

The next minute, I was in Recovery and someone was shouting my name in my ear (or that's how it sounded to me in my drugged up state). 

Eventually, I asked the nurse what they'd found, but she wouldn't tell me and said the doctors would come along later and explain things to me.  Fair enough I thought and I was still pretty out of it  anyway.

The funniest part was when I was still half asleep in Recovery, someone came into my cubicle and asked the nurse looking after me what they had found during the surgery.  She said to whoever it was "they found Endometriosis everywhere." 

So that's how I found out I had Endo!

They obviously thought I wouldn't hear, but I did.  The relief was huge because then I knew I had made the right decision to have the surgery.  I also had a diagnosis, which was awesome, because it's definitely easier when you know what you're fighting.

Today, I am both celebrating and remembering in equal measure.  People have said to me that one day the memories will fade and it will be like it never happened, but honestly I don't think I will ever forget the day I was diagnosed with Endometriosis.